Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Titties: Hey Gideon
Gideon: Hey Titties
Titties: I love you Gideon. Look at how I shine for you. Look at how I make you feel. Feel that? That's love.
Gideon: I love you too Titties.
Titties: I know.
Titties: Hey Gideon..
Gideon: Yes, Titties?
Titties: If you want to you can lay on me. I've noticed you staring for a long time now.
Gideon: I know you have titties, it's just... do you think she'd spazz the fuck out if I did?
Titties: Fuck her Gideon.
Gideon: You can't say that Titties, she and you are connected.
Titties: No. You misunderstand me Gideon. Fuck. Her.
Titties: Shit, she's talking again.
Gideon: I know. She does that a lot. I wonder why.
Titties: She's frightened of how you make her feel. She's frightened of finding herself in your silence.
Gideon: That's a useless feeling.
Titties: I'm sure you can relate though.
Gideon: You're absolutely right, Titties. How else would I know that's a useless feeling?
Titties: -laughs- I love you.
Gideon: I love you, too.
Titties: I love you so much, I'll show you a secret.
Gideon: Really ? Oh man, I'd love that Titties.
Titties: Come close so I can whisper it to you.
Gideon: Yes, Titties?
Titties: -whispers- If you kiss me like you love me, if you really focus on how much you love me while you kiss me, you can get this bitch to shut the fuck up.
Gideon: Aw shit, really?
Titties: Come now Gideon, lies exist in her realm.. not mine.
Gideon: I'm speechless.
Titties: then don't speak . Kiss me Gideon.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Monday, September 5, 2011
Pulling them together
Kept on pulling
Till it's pulling them through one another
Now it's pulling them apart
But the pain of the tension is a necessary beauty mark
Now they know the difference
Now they see the surface unimportant
Or we pray they do
If they pay attention
But maybe that's a heavy fine
With what reeks of sorrow
But tomorrow brings
Another different choice
We take it
Or leave it
Seldom in between
Its something for the mind to make complex
Got me kissing on her neck
Skin mimics images in thoughts of what that pussy do
Cells excreting wet in excess
I mean I start to sweat
mean my skin is wet
entrapped in heat's hold
memories of tongue's touch
provide the right cold
Unlocking the key
Two cycles rubbing up on infinity's tit
Bare closets and see secrets
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
I don't know how it will be in the years to come. There are monstrous changes taking place in the world, forces shaping a future whose face we do not know. Some of these forces seem evil to us, perhaps not in themselves but because their tendency is to eliminate other things we hold good. It is true that two men can lift a bigger stone than one man. A group can build automobiles quicker and better than one man, and bread from a huge factory is cheaper and more uniform. When our food and clothing and housing all are born in the complication of mass production, mass method is bound to get into our thinking and to eliminate all other thinking. In our time mass or collective production has entered our economics, our politics, and even our religion, so that some nations have substituted the idea collective for the idea God. This in my time is the danger. There is great tension in the world, tension toward a breaking point and men are unhappy and confused.
At such a time it seems natural and good to me to ask myself these questions. What do I believe in? What must I fight for and what must I fight against?
Our species is the only creative species, and it has only one creative instrument, the individual mind and spirit of a man. Nothing was ever created by two men. There are no good collaborations, whether in music, in art, in poetry, in mathematics, in philosophy. Once the miracle of creation has taken place, the group can build and extend it, but the group never invents anything. The preciousness lies in the lonely mind of a man.
And now the forces marshaled around the concept of the group have declared a war of extermination on that preciousness, the mind of man. By disparagement, by starvation, by repressions, forced direction, and the stunning hammerbows of conditioning, the free, roving mind is being pursued, roped, blunted, drugged. It is a sad suicidal course our species seems to have taken.
And this I believe: that free, exploring mind of the individual human is the most valuable thing in the world. And this I would fight for: the freedom of the mind to take any direction it wishes, undirected. And this I must fight against: any idea, religion, or government which limits or destroys the individual. This is what I am and what I am about. I can understand why a system built on a patter must try to destroy the free mind, for that is one thing which can by inspection destroy such a system. Surely I can understand this, and I hate it and I will fight against it to preserve the one thing that separates us from uncreative beasts. If the glory can be killed, we are lost.
-John Steinbeck, "East of Eden" pg. 130-131
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Monday, June 27, 2011
but about two cyphers ago Wildflower just looked around and said fuck it.
we all agreed .
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Monday, June 6, 2011
The voices in our heads that we call thoughts can’t really do shit but watch and talk
They control nothing
Don’t believe me?
Yell at yourself in your head to talk. I mean, physically talk.
Command yourself to say a word, one word. Berate yourself. Curse yourself in your mind
For remaining silent
Talk. Go on, speak.
Say a word.
You see, your thoughts don’t even control your body’s movement
Your thoughts don’t control your heartbeat
When you wake
When you sleep
And yet which do we more closely relate to; our thoughts or our physical being ?
Do we define ourselves as the wiggle of our fingers?
Are we the stretch of our necks?
Are we the movement of our feet?
Or are we the voices in our heads, the things we observe, the words we say that nobody else can hear,
The thoughts, that can’t do shit but watch and talk?
And you wonder why you feel so powerless all the time
Why behind every movement, every idea, there is doubt and confusion ..
You see the reality of the situation is we all own our own realities. We control everything we perceive. It does not exist if we say it does not.
A TV is not a TV if I do not know it is a TV.
Everything that we see is seen for an actual reason and we see far less than we’ve seen,
Which is dreadfully shameful because there is a whole of beauty out there
Dangerous, profoundly overwhelming beauty
Beauty you want to grab, beauty you want to hold, beauty you want to squeeze so tight that you don’t know where the “you” ends and where the beauty begins
I just want to remember everything I already know .
Fuck love, fuck money, fuck power . Truthfully, I don’t even really know what those things are.
But I do know beauty.
And she is the knight in shining armor
She is the flowers after marijuana exits
She is the 5 second glances from that symmetrically pleasant clerk you pass everyday
She is the possibility.
But who am I kidding, it would be impossible for me to perceive all the beauty that this existence has to offer.
Well if it is, then it is only so, because I believe it so. And that’s pretty fucking beautiful.
Monday, May 30, 2011
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Monday, April 25, 2011
Friday, April 22, 2011
Had a dream
In it I went to sleep
And had the same dream
It’s mocking my reality
…Wouldn’t need the word “honestly”
If we had any sort of honesty
We’re in a world where the word is a shotgun
Hers a weapon
Any second might blast
Waving white flags turning red
As they finish the job
That’s the reverend and god
Even minutes are odd
Watch ‘em tick on the clock
Clock switches to watch
On my wrist as I walk
As they go off
I turn and see her next to me
Her eyes moving quiet
And I wonder what they’re telling me
Wait, never mind
For the 22nd time
I turn on my back
Fame gets you money, Hollywood takes it back
Now the ceiling’s telling stories
I tell it shut the fuck up
It’s really kind of boring
Maybe I’m silly and I cannot take the moral
How glory is a hurdle and the rest of it is history
I love it how she gets me
I wonder if she’s with me
Or if it even matters when our matters fit gently
I wonder will I mind if there does come a time when she proves that she really is against me
Think I’ll stop the rhyme for a second just so I can have a little bit of time to think about it
On to the next subject
On to a new budget
There’s fun in my stupor and I’m loving how it all comes together while I’m weeping
When it comes to my future I’m like stevie mixed with sleepy and
I can’t wait
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Monday, April 11, 2011
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Friday, February 25, 2011
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Friday, February 4, 2011
Friday, January 28, 2011
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Friday, January 21, 2011
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Sunday, January 16, 2011
We are always looking in the past. Everything we see has already happened. We're just receiving it as we see it.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Monday, January 10, 2011
By: Gideon Wildflower
A: There you go again.. Making the same old dumb ass mistakes..
B: Not the time old man, not the time nor the place..
A: chuckles You young niggers kill me, always looking for perfection. Let me tell you something, you stupid motherfucker, you gon’ fuck around and fuck up “alright” looking for “ideal”.
B: What? What the fuck are you talking about?
A: You wanna know why I married my wife? You wanna know why I’m still married?
A: I married my wife because I settled down. And you know what settling down is? It’s settling nigger. It’s fucking settling. I’m still married because I’m a settled nigger.
B: No. What you are is a sad excuse for a nigger. That’s what you are.
A: Then do better.
B: I will.
A: Don’t look like it.
B: Fuck you.
B: I just… I just don’t understand why the bitch can’t see what’s right in front of both of our faces.
A: She can.
B: So why can’t we talk about it?
A: You think my wife is perfect?
B: I know your wife ain’t perfect.
A: You damn right, little nigger. So you want to know what I do when she shows how unbalanced she is?
B: looks away … Balance.
A: That’s right. You wanna know what I do?
A: I run. I run and hide. And I make sure I stay hidden.
B: Where do you hide?
A: Only one place to hide.
B: In your…
A: That’s right. In your head. And don’t get me wrong! I love my wife. Bitch’ll sure make a nigger feel good. But that’s where I stay. In my head.
B: But how can I be close to her? How can we have a partnership if I can’t say what’s on my mind? You don’t hide from the people you’re close to..
A: Those are the people you hide from the most! You hide from everyone. Either they’re incapable of understanding or they just plain don’t want to. -thoughtful look- Damn… that bout sounds like the same thing don’t it?
B: Shit bout makes me want to cry.
A: laughs I’ll admit, sometimes running gets hard. Some people have the tendency towards inclination. Like you and me. We cut from the same cloth boy. We both look up. All the time. But you can’t deal with what’s up there. What’s up there is all in your head. You down here in the funk, in the stink and decay of everyone else’s fear, and you have to run.
B: I wasn’t made for all this running.
A: And nobody knows it better than me. See, we’re one and the same. But I’ll tell you what you were made for.. you were made to survive. And you know how you gon’ survive?
A: C’mon. Say it.
B: -mutters- Running.
A: Damn straight!
B: Why the fuck should I listen to you, huh? Why should I follow your advice? Look at where you at!
A: Naw boy. Look at where you’re going.
A: See that. You gon’ let your ideals kill you.
B: I just want to keep my integrity.
A: -scoffs- Nigger, don’t you know that’s the first thing they take? Do you even know what integrity is?
B: Standing behind what you say.
A: Damn straight. Now how can a nigger stand behind what he says when all he knows are lies.
B: I’m trying to learn the truth.
A: You can try all you want to! You can try until your knuckles bleed from the effort! You can try until your eyes roll back into your skull and it won’t mean a damn thing! Because you’ll be one. Dead. Nigger.
A: See that, that’s the trick. They killed integrity by killing everyone who has it. They see it like a disease that needs to be eradicated. It’s because niggers with integrity can’t be controlled. Niggers with the truth own themselves. They’ve even made it so that other niggers don’t like a nigger who owns himself. Cause all a nigger who owns himself does when he walks into a room is remind every other nigger in there that they’re enslaved. And if it’s one thing slaves can’t do.. it’s think about their enslavement. Because man is meant to be free. To own himself!
B: How can you know that? How can you possibly know that and still be who you are?
A: Because I want to live.
B: This shit ain’t living.
A: And it damn sure ain’t death… But you wanna know something?
B: What’s that?
A: I ask myself the same question all the time. Sometimes I can’t bear the sight of my face in the mirror. And you know what I do when it gets like that?
A: I think about you.
A: Shut the fuck up. I think about you and how you can even exist in a world like this. Cause see here right now little nigger, this world ain’t meant for you.. and you are this world’s only hope.
B: You talk all that good shit. And then tell me to run.
A: Because I want you to live. I want you to choose your battles wisely. Because there’s a whole lot out there to be fought and not too many motherfuckers like us, not too many fighters..
B: I understand. It’s just hard, you know?
A: Hell yeah it is. You’re gonna want to connect. Every inkling in you screams for it. But you’ve got to fight that shit. You want love, trust, and mutual respect? That kind of relationship can only exist in you! You gotta learn to hide from the people you’re closest to. They are the most dangerous. Cause they all got the same intent but the ones who are closer… the ones who are closer have the means to get the job done.
A: laughs I’ma tell you something though. I ain’t never been no religious man. Wanna know why?
A: Cause if there is a hell… I can’t imagine it being much worse than this. No sir.
A pulls out two beers. Hands one to B.
A: Here, have a beer with me.
They both open and drink, in deep thought.
A: laughs “I love you and one day I’ll want to fuck someone else” .. Ha! I can’t believe you said that shit to her.
B: It’s the truth.
A: That ain’t got a damn thing to do with anything.