people, places, and things pt. 1

mom once told her not to lean back in her chair

or she'd fall

she never did listen to her mother

her mother was addicted to cocaine

and the various erections of nameless lovers

but that's not why she didn't listen

she was frightened

that's much closer to the reason

she was scared that her mother could be right about anything

because if her mom could be right about anything, then she could have

maybe

possibly

been right that Thursday night

when she came into the living room--slash--kitchen--slash--dining room

and said,

"you'll never be any better than me."

that was it.

no explanation, no conversation.

and so the daughter tried not to think about that night often

and

she leaned back as far as balance would allow

she broke curfew religiously

she saved no money. fuck a rainy day.

the whole world is a cloud

and she smoked

good lord, how she smoked ...

if her mother was aware

of anything but herself

then possibly, through psychological negative reinforcement and reverse psychology,

she could've raised the next president

but she wasn't

and so her daughter was destined

to fall

I Just Wanted To See Her Happy

I Just Wanted To See Her Happy

lumumba biko marshall garner

She makes me forget who I am

Turning me upside down, she shakes

my foundation, loosened by her love{..then..fear},

isn't ready to battle the coupled forces of gravity and her arms

And now I'm watching my reflection shatter into a million pieces in the dark

My eye stares back from several slivers on the floor.

Scene.

Right side up again

Okay. It's going to be alright. I'm. Okay. We're. Okay.

And now her finger

a single finger with chipped gold nail polish

she shoves this finger, cut from the feminine hand of God,

down her throat, deep throating my desire to be close to her

and she vomits

the smell.

foul.

everything that I had left behind into my now empty shell

i become a host of her insecurities

and she gloats as she watches how it affects me

how i cower beneath the might of something i once held the power to fight

sometimes, tragedy knocks on her door

she feels the whole house.. no.. her whole life tremble

and so she comes downstairs

where I, blinded by darkness, am searching within for the pride i didn't know I lost

And she sees me

And she spits venom in my eye

Now. I'm blinded by love{..then..fear}

Scene.

she gets out of the car

headed to a machine that holds what she holds dearest

I detest this.

You only lack what you feel you need. You only lack what you worship.

With me gone, she home

i stare at the inadequacy in my bare hands

hands that once held nothing, quite gracefully

then

he drives up

his steed, an ocean blue symbol of status

in it I see the reflection of all that I used to hate

and all that I now covet

my reminder of me still remains

a far away echo

to quiet to turn me upside down

and right side up again

frank ocean tells me, "it's murder she wrote"

i respond, "I hope not."

Hopes. dashed.

she walks up to his car with a smile

I remember that smile.

10 minute conversation stretches on for eons as I wonder at the definitions

of comfort and jealousy

numbers may or may not have been exchanged

and I

well, I wait in her passenger seat

as her passenger, her bitch

frank ocean cries out for the love crime

i tell him "hush, it's suicide, I did it to myself"

Scene.

she's back in the car

pocket a little fatter with something I used to not see back when I was me.

now

she's quiet.

says nothing of the passing transaction

leaving me to wrestle with my insecurity in silence

leaving me to wrestle with my insecurity in silence

leaving me to wrestle with her insecurities in my shit

leaving me to wrestle with her insecurities in silence

shut the fuck up frank.

i know.

you're right.

i'll never ask her for any other favor, ever again.

Especially not,

for her to please..

please..

be happy.

THE END

BandCamp Site.

Man Research.

"A Lyrical Thrust Into The (Blac)est Heart of Modern Darkness: The Mixtape" ... Bitches

"A Lyrical Thrust Into The (Blac)est Heart of Modern Darkness: The Mixtape"

Blac Garner

Man Research Music

manResearch

Blac Garner presents...

...back up

ay listen

i had a dream i was fucking you while holding you down

and you would scream with the passion of a 1000 rounds

shot from the sun

automatically spraying innocent ones

who've yet to enter into positions

upon this battlefield

fuck it

i don't expect you to understand

this man with a plan

that's too big to hide inside his hands

it's leaking

tears from the roots

while the leaves whistle with the wind's secrets

my what strange fruit

dangle from these southern trees

while birds in v's

catch northern breezes and fly by

i

turn the noose around and straighten my tie

i'm late for work

you start to shake and go berserk

now punish that ass

whip to change

i am man in this chain of command

who you fucking with bitch

66 6's crowd around and tell me I should

bust on that ass

but you strut as you pass

quite heavenly

i guess these metaphors are quite rhetorical

especially since my oracle just turned seventy

missing the peak was the hardest

so she turned around and started

giving head like an artist

paint me paint me paint me

i laughed as i painted she

then made her psychic

took a bite of the "right thing to do"

and didn't like it

the apple of my eve

just woke up

and now i'm back up

putting needles on the vinyl

and injecting lyrics to my mind so

even wearing this blindfold

i'll smile

and the sun will make my eyes glow

cause all this shit is a

simply simply

a motherfucking

cycle

...

and i'm a motherfucking psycho

bitch.

Blac Garner -- In Liquor Heights

Cause all we wanna do is...

Download link --> http://www.mediafire.com/?4xqsw2i5k4ha545